Have you ever felt lost? I must admit there was once a time where I was too ashamed to admit that I had no idea who I truly was. I wasn’t even sure what I wanted or desired in life. I felt like a complete stranger to myself.

To the outside world, I had it all: the loving husband, great kids, successful career, our dream home—my life checked all the boxes. But inside, I felt so confused, torn, and lost.

Can you relate?

Don’t worry, we aren’t alone, and there’s nothing wrong with us. I promise.

Why You Might Be Struggling to Find Yourself

Not knowing who you authentically are can be ungrounding, confusing, and scary. You’ll be dragged here and there by life without having a grounding point, a space where you feel connected and centered. You’ll enter one job, relationship, and life commitment after another, quickly realizing that they’re not meant for you.… and worst yet, you’ll repeat this confusing cycle over and over again until you learn how to find yourself.

To learn how to find yourself, you’ll need to connect with the core of who you are – your Self, your Soul. And to do this, you need to do some serious soul searching … but where do you even start?!

Let's first look at why you may be struggling to find yourself.

5 Common Reasons for Feeling Lost

• Raised in a Dysfunctional Family: Were your feelings and emotions invalidated growing up? Were you taught to be seen, not heard? Childhood experiences impact our adult life and day-to-day existence tremendously. Your childhood years created the foundation of the beliefs, behaviors, and values you carry right now.

• Low Self-Esteem: Negative life experiences create thoughts (or stories) in our minds that prevent us from seeing our true beauty and power. If you’ve adopted beliefs like “There’s something wrong with me,” “I’m bad,” or “I’m unlovable,” it will be very difficult to find your Self. To see yourself clearly, you’ll need to wipe that mirror clean of false beliefs and illusions.

• Media Influence: TV shows, movies, ads, YouTube channels, and Instagram celebrities make you think that you need to be someone you’re not. This persistent flow of propaganda makes you chase a person who you think you must be, making you forget who you are.

• Daily Habits and Life Choices: Your habits, commitments, and life choices might prevent you from exploring your inner world. These choices can build into a prison that keeps you feeling stuck and trapped, reinforcing your inauthenticity. But small, consistent changes create big change.

• Toxic Relationships: You’re surrounded by people who reinforce inauthenticity, low self-esteem, and poor decision-making. We attract those who “vibe” with us and mirror what we feel about ourselves deep down. If you don’t know who you are, you’ll attract the same types of people over and over again.

And let's be real, on some level, we know that if we do go on this journey of self-discovery, we’ll likely lose relationships and the life we know will crumble. This fear is normal, and truthfully, you will lose relationships, and your life will change in countless ways. BUT on the other side of these transitions, you will experience the most incredible spaciousness, joy, abundance, love, peace, and clarity.

Steps to Finding Yourself

Finding yourself is being yourself. To be yourself, you need to stop thinking you need to be someone else. I know that sounds simple, but it’s one of the most difficult things in the world to implement.

Learning how to find yourself can be a long journey, but trust me, it’s worth it.

Being who you authentically are at a soul level is liberating. It creates the most incredible ripple effect through your life that can only be explained as a miracle. So much in your life will start flowing with a level of ease and grace once you start the dance to remembrance, the path of finding yourself, the journey of self-discovery.

Your relationships will improve. Your work life will improve. Your family life will improve. Your mental and emotional well-being will improve. And above all, your relationship with YOURSELF will improve.

Here Are a Few Steps You Can Take:

• Make time to be alone in solitude.

• Mentally, emotionally, and energetically purge.

• Become clear about your top five core needs.

• Contemplate what you really want in life.

• Explore, travel, find your passion.

• Say goodbye to people and commitments that reinforce inauthenticity.

• Connect with your spiritual center, your higher self, and your inner child.

• Find a guide, a healer, a light leader to support you through your inner explorations and energetic clearing.

Some of these practices will work for you, and some won’t. That’s okay. Experiment and don’t be afraid to fall down and get back up again.

15 Journaling Prompts to Help You Find Yourself:

1. What activities make me lose track of time?
   Reflect on the moments when you feel most engaged and alive. What are you doing during those times?

2. What values are most important to me?
   Identify the core principles that guide your decisions and actions. How do they shape your life?

3. Who are the people that uplift and inspire me?
   Consider the qualities in others that you admire and aspire to embody. How can you incorporate these qualities into your life?

4. What are my biggest strengths and talents?
   Acknowledge your unique abilities and how they contribute to your sense of self. How can you use them more effectively?

5. What are my greatest fears, and how can I overcome them?
   Explore your deepest fears and consider steps you can take to face and transcend them.

6. When do I feel most at peace and content?
   Reflect on the environments, activities, and people that bring you a sense of calm and fulfillment. How can you incorporate more of these into your life?

7. What dreams and aspirations do I hold for the future?
   Visualize your ideal future and the steps needed to achieve it. What small actions can you take today to move closer to these dreams?

8. What does success mean to me?
   Define success on your own terms, beyond societal expectations. How does this personal definition influence your goals and actions?

9. How do I handle stress and adversity?
   Assess your coping mechanisms and their effectiveness. What healthier strategies can you adopt to manage challenges?

10. What do I need to let go of to move forward?
    Identify habits, beliefs, and relationships that no longer serve you. How can you release these to create space for growth and new opportunities?

11. How do I express my creativity?
    Reflect on the ways you bring creativity into your life. How can you nurture and expand your creative outlets?

12. What makes me feel truly alive?
    Consider the experiences and activities that ignite your passion and excitement. How can you pursue these more actively?

13. What are the moments in my life when I felt most proud of myself?
    Recall instances of personal achievement and pride. How can you build on these successes?

14. What kind of impact do I want to make in the world?
    Contemplate your desired legacy and the contributions you want to make. What steps can you take to start making this impact today?

15. How do I nurture my mind, body, and soul?
    Evaluate your self-care practices and their effectiveness. What additional practices can you incorporate to enhance your well-being?

Without finding out who you truly are, you will forever feel lost in life and continuously make the same mistakes over and over again.

While finding yourself is an inward journey, you don’t have to go at it alone. Schedule a session or join a group event. Join the Soul Embodiment Community for a real, deep connection and support. Ready to dive in and go all in for a deep transformation? Explore the Soul Embodiment Mentorship.

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